A tribute

My grandmother, Marta Grace Walsh (nee VanAuker), passed away last week at the age of 100+. While I am saddened by the loss on a personal and selfish level, I've been surprised to learn how much it has catalyzed a sense of thankfulness.

a - I am grateful I had the great fortune to get to know her after I became an adult - I simply never understood the depth of her character and enjoyable personality as a child. And, to have learned more about how she lived has inspired me in my own life.
b - I am grateful that I got to see her before she passed away. Due to weather craziness over the holidays I hadn't been able to go down to the ranch since last summer, and was deeply sad about that because we all knew she wouldn't have another year. I thank my family for letting us know it was time, so I could see her and be ready to say goodbye.
c - I am grateful for how she went. She did not linger, her pain was well managed by good hospice care, and she was still shockingly with it up till the end. Her vision and hearing were pretty weak and the morphine surely had her a bit whacked out, but she did perk up sometimes and say some pretty funny - and compassionate - things. She then passed away a few hours later in her sleep, still only on the minimum morphine dosage; she did not have to suffer through ever-increasing pain cycles. If I could choose the way I will go, that'd be it without a doubt.
d - I am grateful I got to tell her while she was fully alive and alert how pleased I was to know her, and how proud I was to have her as my grandmother.
e - Finally, I am grateful for my family, and that we could all be together last week.

She was such a strong personality that she still feels like a big presence. I guess I'm kind of amazed that her presence persists - at least for me - so strongly even though she's died. But then again, for someone like her, it kind of makes sense.

Only a few of the many high points from a rich life lasting over a century:

She took her first world cruise in her early 90's, at about the same time she decided to learn how to use email.

She was quite a dancer for much of her life, and at her 99th birthday party she demonstrated that could still stretch her leg up above her head - she seemed to embody the idea that aging was for other people.















She gave birth to my father during the depression, and raised him as a single mother loooong before it was as common or as possible as it is today.

She painted all her life, even taking up new techniques in the last decade just so she could keep learning. This black and white is a picture of her (center, circled) at a painter's retreat in the northern California hills.

















She appeared not to fear anything, and enjoyed travel, watching sports, listening to opera, and taking a strict approach to the weeds in her yard.

Those of you who met her at our wedding may remember a lively, self-sufficient 94 year-old.... she looked and acted like that up until right near the end. It's just so impressive.

When we gathered last June in California for her 100th birthday celebration - which included a hot air balloon trip because she'd always wanted to do that - I just marveled at how she managed to keep up with everyone. Heck, sometimes she was even leading the charge. We all had to take naps to keep up with the full schedule, but she was able to keep pace with us 'young'uns'.

My grandmother in her 20's at a picnic in northern California, with my grandfather's arm around her, and two of their friends.



















GrandMarta - Born in June 1908, died in February 2009, and really full life in between.